As long as I can remember, this amazing woman was there for me. She babysat me when I was young, read me stories, watched movies with me, played card and board games with me, cooked tasty meals for me, gave me advice, shared her love for her ancestors with me.....the list goes on and on. This amazing woman is my Grandma.
Grandma was diagnosed with colon cancer at least 5 years ago. She began a journey of research and of healthy eating to combat the cancer. I am confident that this change helped her to remain with us for such a long time. In early February my Aunt let us know that the time was near and so I made more frequent attempts to communicate with Grandma. You could tell her mind was still there but yet so tired. You could have a conversation with her for a few minutes and then she would start to make a little less sense and you knew she needed to rest. On Febrary 11th my Aunt phoned and told me that if I wanted to see her before she left this earthly life, I better come quick. I flew to Utah on the 12th and surprised Grandma. She was so happy to see me and we sat and visited till she needed to rest. I stayed the entire day and didn't leave till late that night. I went back the next day and we had talked in between her naps. She was so tiny, only weighing about 55 - 60 lbs and the Grandma that I remembered was no longer in front of me. It was as if I was looking at a tiny skeletal shell of the woman she once was. She was however still alert on and off and able to communicate. That night she made it known that she was ready to let go. She talked to each of her children and most of her grandchildren/great grandchildren and said her goodbyes. I sat with her for a few private moments to tell her goodbye. I told her how her testimony had been a building block and source of strength in my life and how it would carry on throughout her posterity. She told me how special I was and how happy she was for me in my new journey in life with a family of my own. I asked her to keep her promise that she would give my mom a special hug when she saw her on the other side of the veil. She looked at me and noticed I was wearing a BYU sweatshirt (she loved BYU). She said, "I will as long as you give me your sweatshirt". I laughed and told her I would be happy to. Then she said, "O.k., I will do it as long as I have such a nice sweatshirt to wear". Yes, she was a little on the loopy side at that point and I'm sure she didn't have a clue what she was saying in regards to the sweatshirt but her humor was there. That was the last conversation I had with her as the next few days she was asleep and pretty much non-responsive. She passed from her earthly body riddled with cancer to the presence of her Heavenly Father, and all her loved ones that had passed before her on Wednesday the 16th of February.
What a woman! She is a spiritual giant and will always be such an inspiration to me.
I will regret not calling her more during the last year. I talked to her on Christmas and I apologized for not calling more frequently but I had a hard time with the Goodbyes and the whole death experience after losing my own mother just shy of 3 years ago to the same horrible disease. She told me that she understood how hard it was but reminded me....this is just a "temporary goodbye" Sherri. This is not the end for us. It was those words that reminded me and renewed the power of my testimony in eternal families. It wasn't that I didn't know this and it wasn't that I didn't look forward to the reunion on the other side with my mother, it was just that fear and sadness that sometimes creeps in. How amazing it is that a few words can open our eyes a little wider to see clearer what is already in front of us. She always knew what to say....and when to say it. Sometimes she would say more than others wanted to hear, but she was honest and gave her opinion. More than likely if we look back at those times, she was probably right on most of them.
I spoke at her funeral. I will post the talk at another time as to keep a journal of it here.
I love this woman more than words can say. She raised such an amazing daughter who became my mother and gave me life. I couldn't have been more blessed! I couldn't have had better examples in my life than these 2 women. I thank the Lord for them in my life and look forward to the day that our "temporary goodbyes" turn into an eternal reunion. I love you Grandma.
